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Title: Love at the Last Moment 4/?
Author: ica_90
Lenght: Drabble and Ongoing
Pairing: Ohmiya
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG
Summary: 3 months left.. within this 3 months, he loves him once again.
Flashback (Nino POV)
Am I making a right decision when I asked him to stay? Am I forcing him to do something that he didn’t like?
Asking myself the two question, I never get any answer to them. Maybe until the end of my life.
It’s not hate that I feel about him. I still love him. forever. Maybe I am the stupid one for letting myself being hurt again and again by him.
I remember that time when I see him in the restaurant with the girl. Damn. She’s pretty. it’s no doubt why he falls in love with her. After all, a relation between two man never been right. It always wrong. That’s the fact that I face every day. And I’m ready enough to hear ‘let’s break up' from him from the moment we start this relations.
But, I never thought that it is me to end it up. And the reason why I end it up.
He’s right when he said that I end our relation because I’m sick, because I’m dying. But I can’t help bursting out saying something that I’ve been keeping all alone inside me.
He doesn’t love me. not anymore. how am I suppose to go through all of this sickness with a person who didn’t love me anymore? isn’t it a burden for him? isn’t it better to face this by myself?
Maybe it is.
But no. he didn’t let me. he comes to me, begging for me to let him stay by my side. I just can’t. I just don’t want him to see me in this way, in this state. I don’t need any pity from him.
I just no longer trust him to take care of me. I just hope that there’ll be no more pain, until the end of my life.
And maybe, watching him happy living with someone else, I’ll might be happy too.
And so, I ask him to stay next to me as a friend. No more love. Just friend.
Let me treasure this love alone.
“Kazu,” he calls me, causing me to turn to my side to take a look at him. I smile.
“Oh-chan. when did you arrive? I didn’t see you coming,” I ask as I watching him settle down at the chair next to me.
“just arrives. Between, I bought you…”
“hamburger… mou, I’ll grow fat if you keep bringing the same food again and again,” I pouted, causing him to make a confuse face.
“eh.. but it’s your favourite food..”
“yes, it is. But it doesn’t mean that I want to eat the same thing every day,” this time, it’s him to pout.
Yabai. I always have a weak spot watching him pouting. I feel like squishing his chubby cheeks, before making a soft bite there, like always.
But now, it can’t be like always anymore. We’re no longer lover. I’ve lost my rights to do all the usual things we always do.
“Nino, what’s wrong?” he asks, his hand holding mine, concern. It’s so fast that I just pull my hand away from his. He looks startled by my action that I can’t help feeling guilty by my doing.
Unable to hide my tears, I turn my face to another side, not wanting him to see I’m crying.
Why is god so cruel letting me to feel this way? I feel so empty.
But then I feel a warm hugs around me. It feels so familiar, so nostalgic that I can’t help to cry even more. I miss this. I miss us.
But I can’t allow having another us anymore. I’m leaving him anytime soon. I shouldn’t have any relation anymore. I just can’t.
Before I know it, I feel a drop of tear on my head. Another drop follows after another.
“I’m sorry,” he chanted. “I’m sorry, Kazu. I’m so sorry,”
I close my eyes, trying to keep this feeling inside me, so that I’ll remember it forever.
“I won’t leave you. not again. I’m sorry,”
God, why are you giving me a hope?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NEXT
i'm not feeling well.. and that doctor of my uni is useless that give me abundant of medicine, but my fever keep coming back. grrr~~~
sorry for the waiting *bow*
Author: ica_90
Lenght: Drabble and Ongoing
Pairing: Ohmiya
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG
Summary: 3 months left.. within this 3 months, he loves him once again.
Flashback (Nino POV)
Am I making a right decision when I asked him to stay? Am I forcing him to do something that he didn’t like?
Asking myself the two question, I never get any answer to them. Maybe until the end of my life.
It’s not hate that I feel about him. I still love him. forever. Maybe I am the stupid one for letting myself being hurt again and again by him.
I remember that time when I see him in the restaurant with the girl. Damn. She’s pretty. it’s no doubt why he falls in love with her. After all, a relation between two man never been right. It always wrong. That’s the fact that I face every day. And I’m ready enough to hear ‘let’s break up' from him from the moment we start this relations.
But, I never thought that it is me to end it up. And the reason why I end it up.
He’s right when he said that I end our relation because I’m sick, because I’m dying. But I can’t help bursting out saying something that I’ve been keeping all alone inside me.
He doesn’t love me. not anymore. how am I suppose to go through all of this sickness with a person who didn’t love me anymore? isn’t it a burden for him? isn’t it better to face this by myself?
Maybe it is.
But no. he didn’t let me. he comes to me, begging for me to let him stay by my side. I just can’t. I just don’t want him to see me in this way, in this state. I don’t need any pity from him.
I just no longer trust him to take care of me. I just hope that there’ll be no more pain, until the end of my life.
And maybe, watching him happy living with someone else, I’ll might be happy too.
And so, I ask him to stay next to me as a friend. No more love. Just friend.
Let me treasure this love alone.
“Kazu,” he calls me, causing me to turn to my side to take a look at him. I smile.
“Oh-chan. when did you arrive? I didn’t see you coming,” I ask as I watching him settle down at the chair next to me.
“just arrives. Between, I bought you…”
“hamburger… mou, I’ll grow fat if you keep bringing the same food again and again,” I pouted, causing him to make a confuse face.
“eh.. but it’s your favourite food..”
“yes, it is. But it doesn’t mean that I want to eat the same thing every day,” this time, it’s him to pout.
Yabai. I always have a weak spot watching him pouting. I feel like squishing his chubby cheeks, before making a soft bite there, like always.
But now, it can’t be like always anymore. We’re no longer lover. I’ve lost my rights to do all the usual things we always do.
“Nino, what’s wrong?” he asks, his hand holding mine, concern. It’s so fast that I just pull my hand away from his. He looks startled by my action that I can’t help feeling guilty by my doing.
Unable to hide my tears, I turn my face to another side, not wanting him to see I’m crying.
Why is god so cruel letting me to feel this way? I feel so empty.
But then I feel a warm hugs around me. It feels so familiar, so nostalgic that I can’t help to cry even more. I miss this. I miss us.
But I can’t allow having another us anymore. I’m leaving him anytime soon. I shouldn’t have any relation anymore. I just can’t.
Before I know it, I feel a drop of tear on my head. Another drop follows after another.
“I’m sorry,” he chanted. “I’m sorry, Kazu. I’m so sorry,”
I close my eyes, trying to keep this feeling inside me, so that I’ll remember it forever.
“I won’t leave you. not again. I’m sorry,”
God, why are you giving me a hope?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NEXT
i'm not feeling well.. and that doctor of my uni is useless that give me abundant of medicine, but my fever keep coming back. grrr~~~
sorry for the waiting *bow*
