ica_90

chapter 9 link is here

Riisa POV

They are stupid, I told myself. I try my very best to hold my laughs.

I didn’t feel great to have this opportunity actually. I feel like I’m using him. Thinking of it, I feel guilty. I hate this thought so much!

“yokatta ne, you able to meet all of us,” Aiba-san words keeps repeating in my mind. Glad? I’m not sure if that is the right words. I just give them a warm smile. I bet if any of their fans know what am I doing right now, I’m sure dead the moment I step out the building.

“Jaa, minna. You don’t have to mind me, I’ll just sit here,” I take my sit somewhere in the room. They are going to practice their new cheorograph, so I really bear in mind to not disturb them.

What distracts me so much is Ohno-san, their leader. The way he looks at me, somehow it’s bothering me so much. It’s like, he didn’t like me. I try to pushed away my thought, but still, I could feel it so strong.

“you didn’t introduce yourself,” Jun said causing me to realize it.

“ah, gomen. Riisa desu, Riisa Byrne,” I introduce myself.

I watch them for about an hour before they stop for a rest. Nino approach me, sitting next to me.

“so how is it?” I smirk.

“you’re not that good like you always brag about yourself,” he laughs, smacking the back of my head.

We didn’t talk so much as then he spends most of his time with Ohno-san. Just then, Aiba-can takes Nino’s place, sitting next to me.

“so, how is it watching us?” he asked.

“That question again,” I pretend to be bored with the question before I break into laugh. “you guys are great of course,”

“ah, even though I mess up a bit,”he mutter.

“of course not a bit, almost,” Jun words causing Aiba-chan to make a hurt face. Of course he pretends to be hurt.

“just like last time, Aiba-chan ask me a lot about the place I came from. He talks to me in English too, which sometimes cause me to laugh when he feels uncertain about what he’s going to say. Somehow, I feel glad Nino brings him to the house last week, at least I have someone I familiar to talk with right now.

“ne, ne, Riisa-chan. Who is your ichiban?” Aiba-chan suddenly blurted the question. I was blushing. I look once at Aiba-chan before I turn to Nino who is by the same time is looking at me too. Then I look down.

“That’s so unnecessary Aiba-chan. Nino is her cousin, she must choose her cousin first,” sho said with a small laugh.

“you’re wrong,” I sing a song those words

“eh, then who?” Sho, Aiba and Jun chorused

“my ichiban huh, chotto ne,” I look at each of them before I answer. “sho-kun”

“hontou??” sho-kun ask excitedly.

“hontou desu,”

“uwaaa… ureshi..” he said. I laugh, a little bit embarrassed by what I said. But then something happened.

I didn’t know if there is something wrong with whatever I said, but the next thing I heard is a sound of the door being slammed. When I turn to look, I only saw Nino standing there with a shock face. Then he sighs before turn his attention to me.

“I think, I’ll call manager-san to send you home. You don’t want to stay here all day long right?” I nodded a little. He then went out the room. This time I’m sure I do say something wrong, just I can’t figure out what. The whole room was silent. No one ever speak a word since the last words from Nino.

“Riida’s acting weird lately, ne,” Aiba saids causing a glare from Sho-kun. I wonder so much what is actually happening between both Nino and Ohno-kun. Are they ok? Am I the one who cause the problem between them worsening? My thoughts stop when I heard a knocked on the door and manager-san there.

“Riisa-chan, let’s go,” he said. When I was about to stand up to go, Jun stops me.

“Anou, Shuuji-san,” he said. “I think, we’ll escort her down. Give us a few more minutes with her please,” my forehead wrinkled. I didn’t know what are they up to by making me stay when it’s obviously a right time for me to go. I stare at Jun-kun with a confuse face. Shuuji-san nodding, accepting Jun’s words. Just when he leaves I grab my bag with the other three looks at me.

“say, riisa-chan.” Jun paused. “Do you love Nino” oh no, not this question again. First from Johnny-san, now from the Arashi member. Jun looks at me seriously. I know, there’s no possible way I can skip that question.

“I do, but not as lover,” I answer it short. Darn it, why is this feeling keeps appearing?

“why not?”

“because it is impossible to love someone who didn’t love me in return,”

“but he loves you,” Aiba-chan snapped back.

“no, he’s not!” it’s painful. The truth. It really hurt me. “What I mean is, he does but not as a lover. I’m his sister. He said it before. It will not move to any other state. Guys, let’s stop about this ok. I’m just having the same question from Johnny-san about an hour before. I didn’t want to answer the same question again and again,” I take my stuff, going out from the room with the other three walks behind me, a little rushing as I leave them behind.

I’m sure I was lying just now. This whole day that I spend in Johnny Entertainment building, I’ve become a good actress. Almost all I said is a lie.

I love him, and my love is unrequited. But I’m glad. I convince myself he didn’t love me. I didn’t have to return his love. I’ll let it be in myself.

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NINO POV

“what is your problem actually,” I asked once I hang up the phone, obviously annoyed. He makes a snort sound, showing he’s annoyed too.

“what is my problem? She is my problem!” I thought so. Just what is actually happened to him? He’s a 30 years old man but acting like a 13 years girl who keeps getting jealous over her bestfriend.

“nande yo, Riida? I was with you all the time, not even glance at her. What’s more” I asked him. Just then, I saw him gritted his teeth.

“ I don’t care if she is your cousin or what, but can’t you see she’s using you?”

“she’s not!” I snapped back. He likes yelling his words before causing me to get more annoy then before.

“I know she likes Sho-kun as her ichiban. But she didn’t use me. Not even once,” I look around before I decided to continue. Luckily there’s no one along the corridor.

“I want her to meet all of you, giving her chance to know us. But you know what she did? She refused it. She refused to get involve with anyone of us,” once again he snort out loud.

“she might pretending it,”

I look at him in disbelieved. He’s not the Riida that I know. He’s change. Totally. Our riida didn’t act this way before. He’s so carefully choose his words before start talking.

“Riida,” I paused, thinking the right way to say the next words. “I didn’t know whatever grudge you hold against her. This is the first time you met her, and you act this way. It really disappointing,” I said. Even I try so hard to not showing it, it’s obvious that there is disappointment in my tone. Riida make a ‘tsk’ sound.

“I didn’t hold grudge again her, Nino,” and then he stopped, a little hesitate before whispering something that luckily I did catch up. “I’m mad because she’s taking away my bestfriend”

“no, she’s not,” he might have cooled down a little, but I’m not. I know, whatever words I say next worsen the situation, but my madness makes me to keep talking.

“it was you actually who widen the space between us,”

Either the temperature’s dropping or my tone causing me to shiver.

“do you ever consider this past 15 years friendship ever worth on you? You’ve went out with every one of them. Futari. But me, not even once. Somehow I wonder about someone has said this. Do you hate me? You’ve been a bias. If anyone who should feel neglected, it was me. Not you!” damn it. Why on earth did I say those words? I didn’t mean it. I’m sure I didn’t. Whatever things that I’ve said are all to annoy him more.

“That’s not the point,” he murmurs.

It is the point,” I just can stay here anymore. I should go or else, I’ll say more unnecessary things. “You know what Riida, if we keep this conversation going, we won’t settle any. We both mad right now. I’m going in,” at the end of the conversation then only I realized. We’re not at the same floor with the practice room. But to be honest, I’m glad with it. Whatever conversation that I held with Riida, she shouldn’t heard it.

I was like forcing my step to the room. It feels heavy. I hate this thing going on between me and Riida. I miss our old self. I miss how cunning and sarcastic I am to him. And I miss to see him smiles even I keep bullying him. But I just can’t keep staying when he says bad things about her.

I’m protecting the one that I love, but in the same time I’ve hurt my very bestfriend.

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Riisa POV

Nino didn’t talk to me. Neither do i. I decided to let him sort this thing out by himself.

We didn’t even meet each other’s eyes during the dinner. Somehow it is awkward. Luckily Kaachan come out with certain topic.

“Riisa-chan, can you look who it is at the door?” I didn’t realize the bell ringing for a long time. i sighs a bit, thinking of him always brings me away from real world.

“ah, ok,” I response to Kaachan who’s been clean up in the kitchen.

I stand up, heading to the door. I never thought someone who’s been pressing the bell just now would surprise me so much.

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ps again://this is originally post in Aibakaland .... i've quite update there :))